Some of these may be slightly NSFW. Bolded ones are my favorites.
Just in case you don't know who any of these people (and that is a very strong possibility), I'm just going to say they're my friends. I'm not going to bore you with more information or with why we are this vulgar.
C57:
1. I spit mad game!
2. Mrs. Grunloh, why do we have to get hard?
3. FLIP JOB
4. That song had definite Jewish rhythm
5. NICHOLS! I'm gonna fuckin' kill you!
6. I'm not some sort of super genius
7. Octavia? What The Fuck?
8. So hydrogen isn't a group one metal
9. Cross multiply and divide
10. I am number one sex machine
11. Power Mullet
12. Colton: HA Nichols I freakin' beat you
Nick: Yeah once. This is the tenth question and I beat you the other nine times.
13. I'm going to shove my foot up your (mumbling)
14. WYIS
15. Colton: Its gotta be like 80 sumtin
Nick: No Colton, its 17.
16. NO, because she'll just walk in here and start bitchin' at us
17. THIS IS MAN COUNTRY
18. WHAT THE EFFFFF?
19. So when you're rich and famous, you'll get on tv and say, "Colton Leake turned me into number 1 sex machine pelvic thrust, pelvic thrust"
20. White male, caucasian
21. I have muunnno (mono)
22. You can shut up and Poke-die!
23. She's about as hot as one of my turds
24. Your face is about as red as my ass after a diarrhea dump
25. I'm gonna shove my foot so far up your ass, you'll be shittin' toenails for a month!
26. UGGHHH! I'm gettin' pounded!
27. I don't want to buy a turbine, dammit! I want a hard drive!
28. Colton: Vickle, stop touchin' my stuff!
Vickle: Does that include your mom?
Colton (thinks for a few seconds): Oooh, good one, Vickle, you can't even think of a comeback!
29. Colton: Chad, get some glasses!
Chad: Colton! Get a girlfriend!
30. Give me that button or i'll shove it so far up your ass, you'll shit a sewing machine!
31. Isaac: Colton, you're on the sexual predator list
Colton: Why?
Isaac: 'Cause you rape little boys
Colton: If by little boys, you mean girls, then yes
32. Mr. Simpson: Find an acronym for SPDF
Colton: Sexy Pussy Dick Fuck!
33. This is harder than banana poop!
34. Maybe if Sam wasn't being such a dickbag!
35. Over there is the Aquarium lab.
36. Nichols your off the tour. You just had to make your smart ass comments.
37. Colton: VD? Who has that?
Nick: Well if its you we don't have to worry about it spreading.
38. If I were me
39. Colton: Yeah the Leake threesome is almost over with.
Nick: I bet you've been in that position for a while now.
40. (While wearing sunglasses) Why's it so dark in here?
41. NICHOLS! I will shove my size 10 steel toe boot so far up your ass, you'll be the next Ironman.
42. Mrs. Grunloh In this case a is just any number
Colton: ASIA!
43. Oly-oly-impia
44. Mitch: My name tag said sine my cosine
Mrs. Grunloh: Maybe you should use sine my asymptote. Too bad there wasn't a trig function that sounded like kiss.
Nick: Cosecant, kinda does.
Colton: COSECANT MY BUTTHOLE!
45. Isaac: They spelled my name Issac
Colton: Sack
46. Sackage
47. Sackagejawea
48. Colton: Man this calculus stuff owns my ass
Nick: So you have a tramp stamp that says "Property of Isaac Newton"
Colton: You're about to have a stamp on your face that says "Property of Colton's punching bag"
49. MOSES! Use your Jesus powers to fix it
50. Colton: I'm the only one who could hit my cousin
Nick: You're the only one who'd hit on your cousin
Colton: Do you want to start running now?
51. Quehl don't eat that kid. I know he looks like a Butterball turkey but he's not.
52. Mr. Simpson: So do you guys know what heavy water is?
Colton: Is it when you have a lot of water?
53. Donkey shaft bullshit!
54. Mr. Simpson: Any other questions?
Chad: 38
Colton: 37
Chad: I said 38
Colton: I KNOW THAT! We're going in alphabetical order
55. Whitney has no holes! I'm runnin my fingers all over her and I can't feel anything!
56. John: You could walk into some of them in Chenoa.
Mitch: What, sluts?
Colton: They could walk on my dick!
57. Isaac: When I was little, people could say "coming", and I wouldn't understand it.
Mitch: Yeah, "coming" used to go over my head
Colton: Coming goes over my face!
58. Wasson did an unexcusable act to my groinal area
59. Simplify, muthafucka!
60. Why is Ecuador in the ocean?- oh wait, that's the equator.
61. Sackage! stop drawing on my bulging Bliceps and my raging forearms!
62. Isaac: what's better, football or basketball?
Colton: Fooketball
63. Mr. Simpson: this glue is really adhesive.
Colton: I'll show you really adhesive human glue
64. Colton: Vickle! You have a tiny cock!
Vickle: Your mom didn't complain it last night. In fact, I think she liked it.
Colton: ...Yeah, cause she can jerk you off with her nose!
65. Chad: Ew! Colton are you touching your balls?
Colton: Oh yeah. I'm touching my balls, and i'm getting excited while I'm doing it!
66. I wouldn't suck your dick if it had green eggs and ham on it!